Support It

Photo taken from this blog post. Thank you!

I Googled ‘event calendar’ yesterday for the town I live in thinking I would find a multitude of things available to get me off my fat butt during the week. It seems there are a whole lot of support groups in my area—most of them for addiction to alcohol or narcotics. While I do not have an addiction to either of those things, the narcotics anonymous groups have titles that make me think the group is a ball of fun.

Who wouldn't want to participate in a group titled KiSSS? It almost sounds like speed dating (speed as in: n. rapidity in moving, going, traveling, proceeding, or performing; swiftness; celerity: the speed of light; the speed of sound. NOT Amphetamine or methamphetamine)

Other real NA group titles in my area are Addicts R Us (yes, just like Toys R Us, but not nearly as fun) and Monday Madness (this sounds like an amazing Labor Day sale).

I have many of my own ideas for support groups. There are so many things I need support with. I will throw a few out there and take a survey of who might want to join what.  

Mis-Fortune: This could be support for those with actual missed fortunes (they miss all the money they used to have before they trusted Bernie Madoff) or even a support group for accident-prone individuals. This group should not be confused with the beauty contestant information session being held across the hall.

Un-Fare: A support group for over-eaters or individuals who never tip their servers.

It's Gut to Stop: A support group for people who over-internalize all their problems (which may lead to IBS, ulcers and anger-management issues- all of which would have a separate support group).

Visa- Vis: Support group for over-spenders. Helping individuals change their lives, by reversing the charges (so to speak). This is not a get-out-of-debt gimmick, and leaders will not contact your creditors for you.

*My Breastfriend: I am always looking for a little more support for my gigantic breasts. Not sure how this would go down- an entire hour of someone in the group holding your breasts up to give your back a rest, or more of a discussion group on the best bras and plastic surgeons?

*Disclaimer: This name is stolen from a maternity product made to assist with breastfeeding.